Sunday, September 26, 2010

What's on the shelves in your school's library?

The last couple of weeks have been educational. In the parenting sense. A friend of mine has a daughter that checked out a book from her middle school library. The title is What My Girlfriend Doesn't Know by Sonya Sones. This book was an extremely inappropriate book to be in the hands of an 11 year old child. It talks about many things that 11 year olds should not know or care about. What is concerning is that this book and many others are available in your child's school library. The librarian doesn't have time to read every book, obviously. But, shouldn't there be a screening for appropriate books to fill a library for middle school children? The boy in the book states that he would rather feel his girlfriends breast than be in an orgy with Victoria's Secret models.......Is this really ok for your 11 year old kid to read? All the reviews for this book give glowing comments, two thumbs up, award winning....The dilemma comes here....who gets to decide what I think is appropriate for my kids to read? You, me, the librarian, the principal, Jenny on the block? Who gets to decide that there will be no discussion of God or morality, but books about sexual conquests of adolescents fill the shelves? I hate that book was there but I hate worse that someone else that I don't know how/why gets to decide what my kids can and cannot read. I greatly value literature (except for anything written by Jane Austin). Literature opens doors for people and is a fabulous creative outlet, but why is that book in a public middle school library?
I am a pretty open parent. I think the truth is the best way to go. I don't lie about or cover up much when it comes to their questions about sex. If I'm honest then they are better armed for the future, it's coming right around the corner.....and for some of you, it's here. It makes me nauseous thinking about it, but it's coming. There were two 8th graders pregnant at my son's school last year and one this year at my husband's school. What the heck is going on? Why and how were these kids able to engage in such adult actions? Is it because they hear and read and talk about it so openly now? I'm at a loss. I just know that when the male birth control shot/pills becomes available, I will tell my kids they're diabetic and they have to take this medication.......That's my plan.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Love and Family

When we were at the carnival yesterday JC and Eli were playing carnie games and they both won a small prize. The game attendant said they could trade in the two small prizes for one medium prize if they wanted. JC instantly told Eli to trade them in for a panda to give to Lilya (my niece, she is treasured). Eli wanted the light saber and would not do it. So JC was so disgusted at Eli for being selfish and not getting Lilya  the damn panda. He razzed him for the rest of the day and still is razzing him today. JC understands the importance of family and thinking about others even when they are not there. No offense to Eli, but he is only 8 and we are all still a little selfish at 8 because the world still revolves around us, right!!! It made me proud that JC was instantly ready to sacrifice his 'prize' for his cousin because he loves her.
We have a very strong sense of family. I think family is the most important part of our lives. The interactions we have with each other, the love we share, the memories, good and bad...They make us who we are. Families and the chaos that ensues make us human. They make us whole. My family is pretty chaotic. We have been through many divorces and drama and still love each other. I love all of my ex-step moms...my kids call one of them Me-Maw and she and my dad have been divorced for over 20 years. I consider my ex-step brothers and sisters as still my family. We are a good an also certifiable group. When my sister died we became a tighter group. I love them more. I love my family more because of her death.
I have lived without my older brother for most of my life. He is in the military and has been for the last 23 years. He is retiring next year and planning to move back to us. I am so excited and it makes my heart so happy. He has been the missing link (no offense, Todd). I wish Wendy were here to share in his homecoming. I miss her so much. I still think to myself that I need to call her and tell her then I quickly realize she won't pick up the phone. But, she will listen in her own way. My boys and my nephews and niece will have a chance to be closer to their uncle and cousin and create room for a whole new chance at memories. I want my kids to have a strong sense of family; it's my biggest mission. I think I'm succeeding.
We only get one shot to live and to love and to laugh. God's most important commandment was to love one another. If you'd like to all join hands and sing Kumbaya then let's. I would do anything for my family even if I didn't want to do it. Not only because God asks me to, but because I love them.